4 more
2 bites …
arghh… !!
gettin tired….maybe that’s why… putting down laptop and going to bed.
2 bites …
arghh… !!
gettin tired….maybe that’s why… putting down laptop and going to bed.
well, I made it through most of my day without pulling my hair out… up until the verrry end when I suddenly found myself doing it while I was stressing out over some school stuff…
I’d caught myself doing it a few more times, idly, whilst sitting at my comp earlier in the evening, but I’d been able to stop it from happening.. guess the school stuff was too much -.-
I think it was somewhere around 15. maybe only 6 follicles.
I’ve actually been pulling quite a lot this week, and I’m kinda bummed out about it, but… ehh… more on that next time… this is just a short little note to myself..
I’m going to try and keep better track of the amount of pulling, starting now, so this is a new category of posts..
well the first few days went fine. But on Tuesday I had a really awful time. I pulled for 2 hours =/ even when I was in the car with my SO … usually I can refrain from doing it around other people. Maybe it was because I’d been restraining myself for the days before …
actually though, I even pulled a little bit while I was driving, a few days before that… Fri I think.. I was extremely stressed out and driving in unfamiliar territory …. but I can’t believe I was actually doing it while I was driving… how dangerous…. luckily that didn’t last for too long..
some of the more severe pulling was definetely brought on by my inability to resist pulling at my white ones, when I’d look in the mirror before bed. There are a lot of them now… so I got some black hair dye to cover them up so that I can hopefully stop noticing them so much.
my scalp is sore again, on the right side near my ear, which is one of my usual spots.
still though, I think once the extensions are in, they’ll barely be noticeable. I am getting them done tomorrow. Flying out to Chicago tonight.
thank the lord there are hair professionals out there..
well it’s been 2 days since my last entry. Things are going ok. Not completely pull-free… but no more than like 30 I’d say since I last wrote, which isn’t too bad. I really have to stop looking in the mirror so long before bed. The white hairs I’ve accumulated (largely from pulling in the same places for sooo long…) are really bothersome and just BEG to be yanked out. I’m going to have to dye my hair I think to keep that from being an annoyance, cuz there really are quite a few patches of them now.
well, that’s about it for now.
pulled like 30ish strands just now while I’m at my computer waking up. For some reason it’s always the worst either late at night right before bed, or first thing in the morning after just waking up. I wonder why that is?
I wish I could find a way to attach one of my wigs more permanantly to my head, I feel like I should glue it on while I wait this last 7 days before seeing my hair extensionist, so I don’t make it any worse! That wouldn’t be too comfortable but at least it would stop me from doing it. I actually just came across another trichster’s journal yesterday who had had it for 8+ years and wore a wig all the time, even to bed! She wrote that she hadn’t had a comfortable nights sleep in all of those years! wow. I get uncomfortable enough to take them off after like 6 hours… but maybe I should give up some of that comfort for awhile, it might serve as a good reminder to the emotional discomfort that the physical discomfort of wearing a wig all the time will help get rid of..
hrmm, well… 7 more days. starting right now. wish me luck.
I’m off to the gym now to get some of this nervous energy out of my system… hopefully that’ll help too.